I sit and watch the pup pups playing. I focus on one, and simply
enjoy the show. I'm watching all the years of growth I've been around to see, all
the years yet ahead.
I
sit and watch this fantastic beauty as she sleeps beside me on the chair, listening to
the gentle sounds of sleep. I am reminded of the way she (Kaley) looked while
she slept in her bed as nothing more than a worm with legs, along with her siblings, after they were born.
My
back would scream in pain, my legs would be worse after the long hours of caring for them and their mother, but I didn't care. I
would sit, and I would watch. I observed the wonders of nature, of life, of love, lying there in that nursery bed. Admiring what came of nothing.
Sometimes
I will hold them and do nothing more than look into their eyes, seeing
everything residing within. The intelligence, the love, the amazing way
parts of nothing can come together to form such a beautiful creature. I
don't think about how hard it is at time with them during their misbehaving moments, I don't stress over the moments of
their training that seems to go so slow.
I am simply grateful to
know this amazing four-legged adventurer, this loyal lover, this brave warrior who tackles every day with smiles. I appreciate every moment.
I
watch them because I love them. I love to see them grow, love to see
the way they express their love to one another, I learn from them. I
learn how not to dwell, how to be who I am without fear. How to love without conditions.
Most
of all I watch them because they are fascinating. They were once
nothing more than parts of theirs parents and I am amazed at how life
brought forth and transpired to create these creatures. I am fully
present, and experience the miracle of life while I watch them.
Sometimes
they come over and crawl into my lap if I'm on the floor. If I'm
trying to capture a photo of them, there are times I will find a heavy
presence on my lap only to discover one has laid against my leg, or hip. Just so they can touch me. If I'm kneeling down to kiss
another, one will creep under my chest and snuggle beneath the cave of
my hair, daring a sibling to mess with them. I laugh because they want to
cuddle that way and I know it is because deep down they know . . . I
will keep them safe. There is a feeling that comes with that, which is
hard to express unless you've known it.
It's a feeling
that says that animal (or child) has placed 100% trust in you because
they believe in you. They not only know you will protect them, and that
they feel comfort in your presence, but
you know that the faith is warranted because you
will do everything to protect them.
I
watch them play and I find them so utterly captivating and beautiful
that I can't tear my gaze from them. These are moments I won't get
again and I want to savor every last miniscule part of them.
If
they were a child, I would imagine they would be bothered. But then
they would grow up and find themselves understanding something vital.
Like
the reason she was watched by her father all the time. And though she
complained and it drove her nuts to find her father watching her, she would grow up to finally understand why he always said he liked to watch his beautiful daughter.
It would make sense to
her why he treated her like such a treasure. Because he too, saw a
miracle sitting before him that he wanted to treasure. He wanted to
absorb every moment of her existence because that little girl (no matter
how old she got) was his every wish come true.
Even if she always cried out, "stop watching me!" It just made him smile and he would eventually sneak a peak once more.
Eventually
I have to work, but I always sneak a peak at them once more as well. I eventually grab one that nitpicks me to get my attention, and I give them a hug and a kiss. They would probably
say the same to me if they could speak, "enough mom, geez!" but I can't stop myself from watching them and being
absorbed by their existence.
By what is possible from life.
Ariana
Comments
Post a Comment