Despite my so far, lack of winning moments in finding love, I still have hope of finding a great love.
I'm not interested in having a thousand boyfriends from the past that in the future I can look back on and say oh yeah, I remember that one. That's not me. I'm just not interested in finding something like that. Never have been. Never will be.
No, the love that I wish to find is one that takes a while to build and lasts for a lifetime. They say you're supposed to date around and justs enjoy the time, enjoy the ride, etc., etc., but again, that's not for me.
I wasn't raised to be that girl.
I was raised to be a one-man woman.
No, the love that I hope to find is the love that simply is there. It's the love that starts out as a friendship and builds into something stronger and unbreakable. Maybe I'm just a hopeless romantic in that way. But I believe it's possible. I know it's there, I just have to find it.
To find the man who looks at me and sees forever. He sees his life; his future; his children. Rather than rushing off to be with someone else, or being able to deny his feelings for me, he can't, and he stays. He sees me and he knows as much as he can live without me, he just doesn't want to. The same way I would feel about him. I want to find someone who knows his life is simply better with me in it. Like mine with him.
I have hope that I can find something like that. Something sweet, true, and pure. Something long-lasting like my grandparents had. A love that started in their childhood and from then on, they weren't without each other for long and still nit-picked each other every day until the day they died.
That sort of love isn't a "rare" occurring one... no... it's just not advertised all over because most find it boring. And the ones involved aren't causing all the drama which comes from not really knowing someone, yet rushing in within a few months. They want passion, excitement, thrills!! But that is the sort of thing which builds fast, rushes over you, and leaves you feeling as though you've been ran over.
My hope is to find that true and pure sort of love and until I do, I have no problems being single as I'm happy to be. Though being 30, I do have days where I ask myself, when is it my time? Some see this strong woman as a force to be reckoned with, and a woman who doesn't need a man. No, I don't need a man to make it. I've done just fine on my own and I will do just fine still. I just want one.
For the right one, I will let go of the single life and enjoy coupledom. I would be happy being married. But I am, and will remain, happy to be single as well. I don't need to be married, which is why I'm in no rush. I honestly don't think about it much. It doesn't even cross my mind when I meet some guy. I'm just happy to be living in the moment with him, and having fun. I don't base my happiness on whether I'm with someone, or without. I base my life... on me.
Don't talk to me about the future; don't talk to me about marriage; let's just have fun for now, and see whether we can stand each other in a year hmm?
That is just the way I was raised.
To be happy with someone... or without.
I am happy to be alive. My life is one of the good ones.
I will patiently wait to find that because I'd rather be happy alone, than feel lonely, and be miserable, while with someone.
What about you? Do you enjoy where you're at?
I completely agree with you here. Thank you for such an amazing post.
ReplyDeleteI go through this, too. I feel content to be single but coupledom does have its allure. I know that I want I am not into anything flashy or in a rush.
ReplyDelete@Kristine welcome and thank you so much for coming by, reading and commenting! And thank you! I appreciate that. :)
ReplyDelete@Keishua welcome! Thank you so much for coming by and reading and commenting!